Picture this: I’m enjoying a peaceful afternoon, sipping on my overpriced coffee (because self-care, right?), when someone suddenly starts insisting that I said something I know I didn’t. “I know what I know, okay” they say in anger. It’s disorienting, to say the least, and it makes you question your own sanity for a moment.
Gaslighting is a devious form of manipulation, where someone makes you doubt your own perceptions, memories, and feelings. It’s a game for them (whether they realise this or not), often played to feed their insatiable need for attention and control. When faced with a gaslighter, here are five essential tips to help you navigate the chaos:
1. Trust Your Instincts
I trust my gut, and it starts beeping immediately when something feels off. I’ve trained it that way by validating it over and over. Gaslighters will try to make you feel foolish for your suspicions, but remember, your instincts are your best ally. They’ve got a sixth sense for spotting trouble long before your logical mind catches on.
2. Document the Drama
Consider yourself a chronicler of reality. Keep a record of conversations and interactions, noting down key details. When someone drops a gasbomb and tries to convince you that you’re overreacting, having a written account can remind you of the truth. This is especially useful in a business setting, where toxic bosses often manipulate narratives to deflect blame and maintain control. It’s your secret weapon.
3. Establish Strong Boundaries
Setting boundaries is crucial when dealing with a gaslighter. Gaslighters thrive on pushing limits, so be firm and unwavering. Protect your emotional space as if it were a prized possession—because it is!
4. Seek Support from Others
Surround yourself with people who validate your feelings. Sharing your experiences with trusted friends or family can offer clarity and reassurance. They’ll remind you that you’re not imagining things and help you regain perspective when the gaslighter tries to make you feel isolated.
5. My fav! Know When to Walk Away
Gaslighters feed off drama and chaos, so don’t indulge them. Recognise when it’s time to step back and prioritise your well-being.
Then go and enjoy that overpriced coffee in peace,
Lee
Lee Mayimele 